Hot pepper!

Chris Marrou of KENS-5 takes a bite of the hottest pepper on earth. Kinda dorky, but still good for a laugh.

Best line:
"It's real snot, too!"

Really, really wanting it to be Chupacabra!

Remember Phylis Canion, the woman who was sorely disappointed because her chupacabra head turned out to have come from a coyote's body? Well, she's not satisfied.

From KENS-5:

Despite DNA testing by Texas State University that indicated it was a coyote, the beast's identity is still in doubt to rancher Phylis Canion.

Canion is back to poking and prodding her prize possession, digging up more muscle tissue.

Ever since the DNA testing, Canion says scientists from across the nation have been hounding her for a more accurate match.

They want another sample taken from the animal that had haunted her ranch, and this time, the experts want a back molar.

So the South Texas rancher is playing amateur dentist and extracting the tooth from the beast's mouth to be sent to the University of California-Davis School of Veterinary Medicine.

"We could be looking at something new. Some sub-species within a species. And that's what I'd really like to find out," Canion said.

...

The DNA results from the veterinary school are due in December and Canion can't wait for the results to see what had been lurking at her ranch.

Oh, she wants it to be a chupacabra----sooooo bad.

"Heat from Stove Catches House on Fire"

This is odd.

From WOAI:

The fire started at a home on Pleasanton Road on the city's South side. Four young boys narrowly escape a fire in their home Saturday morning.

...

Investigators say it started when the four boys were using the stove to stay warm. Heat from the stove started a fire which prompted the boys to run next door.

That's gotta be an extraordinarily hot stove. In fact, I'm skeptical that mere heat put out by the stove actually caused the home to go up in flames. There must have been something else involved -- a fuel source that caught fire, an electrical short, something.

Car crashes into house

Happy Thanksgiving!

And here's your latest installment for vehicular houseslaughter (from WOAI):

Investigators say three teenagers in a mini van lost control while driving on Dexter St. near Cupples Rd. around 9 Thursday night. That van went across the residential home's lawn before hitting the front of the house.

The homeowner was watching television inside at the time, but wasn't hurt.

I bet she was surprised, though.

San Antonio is number two twice

The Alamo City has the distinction of reaching number two on two different lists. The first one I am dubious about:

"San Antonio Ranked 2nd in Texas Hate Crimes" (from WOAI)

More and more people are becoming victims of hate crimes according to an FBI report released Tuesday.

...

The FBI has San Antonio ranked second in the state for the most hate crimes in 2006. That's nine more hate crimes in San Antonio in 2006, than in 2005.

FBI stats site is here.


The second one I can definitely believe:

"S.A. allergies among nation's worst" (from the Express-News)

The Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America has ranked Austin and San Antonio as the worst and second-worst cities in the nation, respectively, for fall allergy sufferers. Oklahoma City, Lakeland, Fla., and Orlando, Fla., round out the top 5.

Stupid ragweed, cedar pollen, oak pollen, etc.

But, is it ocean-front property?

Watch out who you give money to. The sell may be hard, the offer may sound nice, but -- just think about it.

From KENS-5:

A former Lackland Air Force Base medic is selling the moon by the acre, and some folks in San Antonio have decided to buy a piece of the rock.

About 50 San Antonians own lunar property. You can buy an acre for $19.99, plus tax.

... In 1980, Dennis Hope was looking for a way to get some money when he had an epiphany.

"I looked out the window at 2:30 in the afternoon while I was doing this thought process, and I saw the moon and I thought, 'There's a lot of property,'" said Hope.

It seemed like lunacy until he researched the 1967 Outer Space Treaty. It was signed by the United Nations, the United States, and the former Soviet Union.

The treaty prevents any sovereign nation from claiming ownership of any galactic property, but states nothing about an individual or company.

"So, I wrote a declaration of ownership for the moon of earth and the other eight planets and their moons and sent it to the UN, the U.S., and the Russians, along with a note stating if they had a legal problem with what I did to let me know and I wouldn't sell the property. And I've never heard from them on that note," said Hope.

Hope is "absolutely" positive that he owns the moon and the eight planets, and there's nothing one can do about making the same claim. [emphases added]

Well, he might want to check with R.G. Griffing, first.

"Katrina evacuees may be struggling after funding runs out"

Did you know there are at least a couple thousand people displaced by Hurricane Katrina two years ago that are still in San Antonio and living off the taxpayers?

I didn't, until KENS-TV informed me.

San Antonio is facing the possibility of a huge increase in the number of homeless people on the streets.

An estimated 800 families — all Hurricane Katrina evacuees — are still on assistance here. Now that funding is running out fast, and some are worried they'll have no roof over their head.

...

"There are some clients who are living in apartment complexes where they won't accept the HUD, so those clients have to find a new living place," said Josee Battle, director of evacuee services for Catholic Charities.

The charity is one of only three agencies in San Antonio still providing help to Katrina evacuees. About 800 households still need assistance, and in March, that funding will end.

"I think that we're going to have a lot of clients that will be homeless, which is a sad reality," Battle said.

Potentially, that could mean an additional 2,000 to 3,000 people living on the streets of San Antonio.

I knew there were a lot of evacuees still living in town, but I didn't realize so many had not made the transition to independent living.

"After Crash, Man Tries to Switch Spots with Unconscious Passenger"

Wow.

(WOAI)

A man was driving too fast, when he lost control, and crashed into a drainage ditch. He was trying to exit on General Mcmullen at Highway 90.

But then, after the wreck, witnesses say the man tried to switch places with an unconscious woman in the passenger seat.

Guess what? He was drunk.

Wow.

Saving the deer to their ruin

As KSAT-12 reports, Hollywood Park has a deer problem.

It seems that some residents of this San Antonio suburb like to keep the deer around. But deer overpopulation can cause its own problems, not least of which is an actual danger to people.

In years past, city officials tried netting the deer, and while the city chose a more humane method this year, some residents said they are still angry.

Some said they don't want the deer in their back yards; others said they want them left alone.

"They had to remove some. They had to because we'd be elbow to elbow with deer if they hadn't," said Hollywood Park Human Society president Cherie Emick.

Emick has long fought to keep the deer, but now she said she realizes too many could be dangerous for drivers.

But, of course, there's resistance.

[Police Lt. Joe] Quintero said trappers tranquilize at night because residents against deer removal don't interfere with them, and he said it's safer.

"At night, there's less traffic and less chance of the animal and any of the citizens getting hurt," he said.

Officials have to work at night because there's less interference from the deer lovers, interference with their official duties. I know none of the deer lovers will actually listen to me, but their intentions (good or otherwise) could actually kill some of the deer they're trying to save, and it could result in loss of human life. I don't see why they can't agree on a reasonable reduction of the population.

Leaving the neighbors in the dark for the sake of pot

If you live in an apartment and you notice there have been a lot of unexplained power surges and losses, you just might have a pot-grower for a neighbor.

KENS-5 explains [emphases added]:

Police have arrested one person after power surges at a North Central San Antonio apartment complex sparked suspicion. Officers say the person was using all the electricity, possibly to grow marijuana.

Investigators said maintenance workers at the Ashley Oaks Apartments, in the 16400 block of Henderson Pass, called police after residents had been complaining of power problems.

On Wednesday, undercover narcotics officers pulled the plug on the operation.

"They used electrical cords to rig up, and possibly to grow, where they're growing marijuana plants. Unfortunately, this guy's not an electrician," said an undercover officer, whose identity KENS 5 is protecting.

That dude must have had quite a setup. Although I'm not sure why the officer would say "possibly to grow". Were there no plants in the ground? He was using "all the electricity", after all, so he must have been doing something. A search warrant has been issued, though, and I wonder what they will find.

"Registered Sex Offender Mayor Says He Can Still Run Town"

I must admit, it was the headline of this WOAI article that caught my eye.

A mayor is now a registered sex offender, but says he can still run his town.

The mayor of Poteet, Lino Donato, pleaded guilty to exposing himself and touching underage girls. He said planned to resign. Now, he's changed his mind.

He may indeed be able to run the town, but I wonder how many of his constituents want him to.

"Man Blown Off Sailboat"

A man was blown off his homemade sailboat and ended up in the drink at Woodlawn Lake, as WOAI reports:

"I wasn't worried about it. It happened real slow. When the boat went sideways, I knew it was going to flip over," said Gorge Gonzalez, the man involved in the accident.

Gonzalez was wearing a lifejacket.

He managed to swim with the boat to the lighthouse where firefighters rescued him.

That must have been a dinky sailboat.

Anyway, what's strange is that this guy seemed to need a lifejacket. And seemed to need to swim and be rescued. I remember they drained that little lake recently to dredge it. At the time, I thought that it looked very shallow, and that someone might be able to stand upright in it and actually be fine. And, looking at these pictures, I seem to remember it correctly.

And here's a couple of pictures with the lighthouse that the man took refuge on in the background.

"Residents Upset With Adult Club"

Councilwoman Diane Cibrian has inspired others.

From KSAT-12:

On Friday night, defenders said they went undercover to expose flaws in the laws. They said they went to West Avenue's Club Babylon, billed as a bikini dance club.

The club is a "Bring Your Own Beverage" and not licensed as a sexually oriented business, so certain body parts must stay covered.

But on hidden camera, KSAT said it found topless dancers, which is a violation of city code.

...

The manager said that when it happens the girls are punished.

"They have done it before. We send them home," Club Babylon manager Manuel Alvarado said. [Sounds reasonable. --ed.] "We follow Texas rules -- Texas laws."

The city has already shut the club down once for illegal nudity, city officials said.
"We did do an investigation, and we did find out that they were operating, indeed, as a sexually oriented business," said Rod Sanchez, the Director [o]f Development Services.

...

Perhaps most shocking is that with no liquor license and no sexually oriented business license, that kind of club can open almost anywhere.

"As long as those body parts are covered, they are technically not a sexually oriented business," Sanchez said. [Free speech, freedom of expression, and all that. --ed.]

The club is open 24 hours a day.

Because the city can't possibly make sure the proper body parts are covered all the time, neighbors of Club Babylon would simply like clubs like this to be classified as sexually oriented businesses, which would require a change in the definition and a vote by the city council.

Sure, just change the code to make them instant criminals. I'm sure they'd get a lot of support from Cibrian.

Chupacabra!

Revealed!

KENS-5 had DNA tests done on that chupacabra head Phylis Canion from Cuero kept in her freezer after killing the creature. And now, the true identity of the creature is known! It is---

---a mangy coyote.

And Phylis doesn't seem happy.

(Link to come later.)

UPDATE: The link is here. Watch it for a good dose of entertainment.